Home Blog The Medi-Mullet

The Medi-Mullet

Written on January 7, 2009 at 1:30 am, by Eric Cressey

I’m a big fan of MulletsGalore.com – and frankly, if you are any kind of God-fearing model American, you should be, too.

At this landmark site, they categorize various mullets into any of a number of subcategories – from the Camaro-Mullet to the Mull-Hawk – in a classification scheme that is rivaled only by the Dewey Decimal System, the Dow-Jones Industrial Average, and the Dollar Menu at McDonald’s.  Mulleteers are classified according to mulletude, aggressiveness, hobbies, sightings (where they can be found), favorite bands, and sidekicks.

So, you can imagine how thrilled I was when I caught this never-before-seen species of Mullet on The Biggest Loser the other night.  Yes, folks; it’s the medi-mullet, a doctor setting a haircare trend:

It just screams, “Hippocratic Oath on the Top; Party in the Back!”  Rankings below are out of 10:

Mulletude: 2 (have to be subtle to stay professional, even if you can’t wait to get out of that suit and throw on some torn stonewashed jeans and blast some Def Leppard)
Aggressiveness: 1 (bedside manner is still somewhat important, even if people will give you the benefit of the doubt because you have a mullet)
Sightings: Book Signings, hanging out with aerobic-minded personal trainers who wear man capris

Favorite Musician: Michael Bolton, of course

6 Responses to “The Medi-Mullet”

  1. Super-Trainer Says:

    You need to write ad male fashion and style as your new niche – I think you have a knack for it – lol –

  2. Frick Says:

    medi-mullet and man capris damn that is so funny.

  3. Ben Says:

    Eric – if you were the trainer on The Biggest Loser, what sort of training and challenges would you get them to do?

  4. blinky Says:

    very funny. i’ll have to mullet over.

    [ MG is switched off 🙁 ]

  5. Robert Says:

    Great question, Ben.
    What say you, Eric? What challenges would you have them do?

  6. Bob Parr Says:

    I second Ben’s question. It would make for an interesting article or blog post to get your perspective on this. Yeah, I know the show centers on an extreme population with extreme goals, but I can’t help wondering about the joint pounding involved in having 350-400 lb+ people run for hours per day.

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